


What a wicked thing to do

by SwirlsOfBlueJay



Category: Marvel, Marvel (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, Thor (Movies)
Genre: Angst, Canonical Character Death, Gen, Thor: The Dark World
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-18
Updated: 2015-03-18
Packaged: 2018-03-18 12:08:30
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 753
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3569078
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SwirlsOfBlueJay/pseuds/SwirlsOfBlueJay
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Loki's introspection on the death of his mother as he machinates plans. Set during Thor: The Dark World.</p>
            </blockquote>





	What a wicked thing to do

Holding the moniker of God of Lies and Mischief is rather inconvenient for someone who is the God of Lies and Mischief. People already expect his deceit. Loki takes it as a challenge. After all it’s no fun fooling those who never see it coming.   
  
Loki  _wants_  to be in shadow but  _needs_  to be seen.   
  
From the moment his not-brother (brother) Thor offers to release him from his cell his mind is spinning plans for escaping/beating Thor/winning. Unheeded by ham-fisted allies, he can apply more finesse to his stratagems. Of course he’s also entirely focused on avenging their mother, but his mind is more than capable of running many paths at once.   
  
(He doesn’t think about his last words to her, doesn’t think about how she was the only one who truly understood him and how his parting words to her were a denial that she was his mother.)   
  
He laughs at Thor’s friends as they warn him against betrayal with sharp knives against his throat, loud and brash, as if his own machinations would ever be so obvious.   
  
(He doesn’t think about the monster staring in at his cell and the steps ahead playing out in his mind’s eye as he didn’t blink. He doesn’t think about how he could’ve, fairly easily, convinced the monster to set him free. Doesn’t think about how if he was free he could’ve saved her.) 

  
  
* 

  
  
They travel to the world of the Dark Elves, seeking out the monster.  
  
Everything quickly falls apart. A weapon flies in Jane's direction. Loki braces to save her, knowing he will possibly be swept into oblivion. It’s to service his plans, to force the idea of his loyalty to Thor. He knows his brother will fly in and save him. And it happens just as he predicts with his not-brother knocking him out of the sky.  
  
(He doesn’t think on how mother died saving Jane, doesn’t think on the unimportance of mortals, doesn’t think on how if Jane dies now mother’s death will be rendered moot.)

  
  
*

  
  
As he watches Thor fight the monster, Loki knows which of his many plans he must choose. It is quite literally a two-faced plan, but Loki has always been a creature of many faces. He splits the weapon into pieces, creates an illusion making it bigger, drives the only real part through the monster and lets it stab him with the unreal part in turn.   
  
(He doesn’t think about giving the monster direction, as little impact on reality as he knows it would’ve had, he doesn’t think about the possibility of said direction leading the monster into his mother’s path.)   
  
He’s killed the monster that killed their mother. It brings only a bitter moment of delight.   
  
Loki looks into the grey above him. Odd that a grey sky should hold such beauty, he feels a kinship with it. Some may think it’s grey feigning as silver, he knows they’d be wrong.   
  
(He regrets none of what he’s done. It was his right, doing what many before had done and knowing he could do it better. He only regrets what it wrought.)   
  
One doesn’t become God of Lies by merely allowing blood gushing from his body to sell the story, he puts on a performance, changes his shape,  _becomes_  a version of Loki who is dying.   
  
It’s real for Loki, despite knowing it’s not, his emotions spin in a haphazard fashion. The feel of it all is wrong. He’s faced with too many questions of himself, truths and lies intertwined so close that he’s forgotten the point.  
  
Thor embraces him and Loki feels something inside fissure. Even as the workings of his inner tactician had machinated exactly this, in reality he never expected it. Thor is his enemy, he’s glad of their positions, thrilled to have fooled him so, to have him so certain once more of Loki’s redemption. He is also saddened. One thousand years of love and friendship and brotherhood is not easily snuffed out. Not even by a millennium of unfairness and bitterness.   
  
(He doesn’t think about how Thor has also just lost his mother, who died saving Thor’s love, and will now also be faced with the guilt of his brother dying to save him too.)   
  
Truths slip from his lips unbidden.   
  
(Sorry, sorry, sorry.)   
  
Thor thinks he’s dead.   
  
(He doesn’t wonder what mother would think.)  
  
Loki  _wants_  to be in shadow but  _needs_  to be seen. He takes the throne wearing Odin’s face, it seems a worthy compromise. 


End file.
